sunday funday - speed dating

and here we are again, on our own. I'm sitting at a Panera somewhere in NJ. Panera is one of my top road hangouts, mainly due to their hot green tea and free wireless internet. I'm about to meet up with my cousin who lives in NJ, and offer her an old laptop that I never use anymore. Haven't seen here in years.

I am in a relaxation mode today. I just completed 6 shows in 7 days. many of those shows being of the 90-120 minutes variety. I've thrown in some added covers to compensate for those extra minutes, but the voice has been holding up pretty well, I have been surprised at my own vocal ability at times. Last night at Binghamton was pretty fun (always is). Right after I finished playing they put on a speed dating event in the same area. it happened that there were almost 2:1 girl to guy ratio, so that asked me to step in. For the sake of the success of their event, I stepped up!

I had never done anything like speed dating before. These college kids probably don't meet their soulmate in under 2 minutes, but I was just thinking, that is a good gauge to find out if someone is a dud or not. If you get any moments of silence for more than 1-2 seconds in a 2 minute speed date, then someone is either a stutterer, or pretty bland in the personality department. I lost my voice I was talking so much. Given that I was not a student, much older than all of these girls, and from a land far, far away, I conceded these facts right away with all of them (most of them saw me singing earlier anyway) and my ultimate goal was for them to feel comfortable talking about themselves, their interests and ambitions.

confidence for some doesn't come so easily, even into adulthood. I remember the moment I gained my confidence. I was pretty shy, and at the age of 15 went on a vacation with my mom and brothers/sis. we went to myrtle beach, sc. had a hotel right on the beach and had a really great time. while we were there I met this girl who was 18 at the time and going off to college in ohio. Before I had met her, i hadn't even really had any thorough conversations/flirtations with a girl. after just a few days, a lot of "firsts" occurred and almost at the flip of a switch, I became more confident in my skin and outside of it.

When I got back into Michigan from this vacation, I immediately started flirting more with girls and in high school must have shows a lot of confidence, because for a little while there I was beating them off with a stick. asking girls out, even though I knew they would never say yes. I asked the most popular girls at my school to prom, knowing that they were going to go with the blonde haired football player type, but I figured what the hell, it was good practice, and you never know. In fact, I cannot even imagine the number of times I have been turned down in my life. There have been a lot of times I have chickened out as well, but I swear there must be about 50 times when I asked a girl out just to go on a date or something really casual and "talk to the hand." But I don't think I let those get me down too much, cos if so, the number would never had reached that height.

in college is when I really learned how to communicate. it was part of my studies. that was one factor, but some other partial factors included observing those in close proximity to me for the majority of college and seeing how poor they were at communicating and at life in general. partying and socializing is quite different than what I am referring to right now. So at this speed dating thing I tried to keep these young, impressionable girls interactive, and in tune. It was actually pretty tough, cos we could be in the middle of a sentence and the buzzer goes off, and see ya later. It was fun though, and really I was just biding my time til the veggie pizza came... but don't tell anyone.

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In a separate rant, I'd like to touch on couchsurfing.org. I recently was in Maine, where I kicked off the trip with 2 shows. I ended up hooking up with one of the leaders of the portland CS group, Shannon (a guy). I mentioned him in my previous post briefly, as I had just arrived at that point. Throughout my stay, he showed me around portland on foot, since he doesn't have a car, and that is his preferred mode of travel anyway. it was a really cool town. portland has a lot of qualities of a downtown city but without all the crime, congestion, and other various annoyances. definitely a spot I'd love to visit when there is not a flowing river of melting snow gushing over my feet at every turn (lots of steep hills there oddly enough for a port town).

I had a gig following an open mic there. Shannon had not performed, other than busking, for a while and he had at least a good dozen songs done, so after some light coaxing from me, he decided to play the open mic. he did a good job. playing two originals and a radiohead cover I had never heard before.

the bar was pretty cool and it was pretty light in the crowd due to the superbowl. congrats to the pack by the way.

the night of my departure, there was a portland group CS event at a local bar. I figured I'd hit the road from there to waterville cos my performance the next day was at 11am! so we met up with about 10-15 CSers from the area, ate a little, drank a little and played some darts. this place, Rosie's had some legit dart boards and darts. no electronic, plasticky shit here. i teamed up with a girl named lindsey who happens to live up near brunswick, very close to where my good friend Whitney lives. So she was very familiar with gelato fiasco. I know I always mention it when in Maine, but you know how the saying goes, "when in Maine, must get gelato."

so we busted out of the cool CS event and drove up to the Fiasco and I got 4 flavors in my little cup, overflowing and licking the sides like an ice cream cone. we talked for a small while, but she was tired, and she had a lot of papers to grade or something (being a teacher). She has hitchhiked all across south america and also i believe in Africa somewhere, can't remember the state/city. I am so envious of those who travel with the backpack and stay with strangers, but I guess I do it too. the other countries kinda freak me out though sometimes. She told me that she stayed with CS people in all of those countries and they are all very gracious and like to feed travelers.

So i will leave you with some photo mementos of the trip so far (from my phone)...






Some great wisdom from the people of Canada




this is my host from CouchSurfing playing at the open mic




some horrible driving conditions heading from Maine to way upstate NY. It is worse than it looks kids




this is the type of conditions I have been dealing with since the first day




I guess I'm celebrating being able to see the actual pavement and the sun. nice cruise, albeit only temporarily

Kick off (Superbowl Sunday)

I arrived in Maine today in one piece. Surprising, considering how yesterday afternoon began. after leaving home and proceeding through Canada from one border to the other without any delays, dry roads, and no snow fall at all, I arrived at customs in Niagara Falls, and the snow started to fall. Then my car began to overheat. So I plugged in a search (after waiting 1 hour in line at customs) for a mechanic shop on my gps. Found a place, and the snow was really hitting the fan at this point. Got some coolant - I guess my home mechanic shop needs to review their checklist during oil changes and actually give me coolant next time. So as soon as I got back into the good old U S of A, the weather turned horrible... and then the sun went down, further exacerbating the situation, allowing the moisture to freeze quicker. I must have seen at least 20 different cars strewn alongside I-90. It was a very tense drive. My neck was sore from being so tight, as I was wicked focused on the road, and sometimes that's not enough. My wrists and fingers and hands were also very sore every few minutes from gripping the wheel. Very icy, slushy and wet the entire way. and it didn't stop. So I ended up driving very cautiously, at around 30-40mph on this highway all the way through upstate NY. "If I can just make it to Albany." It took forever, but I did, and then made it somewhat into MASS.

After a much needed nap, a sleep in the car never alleviated more tension before. I made it to my couchsurfer host's place this morning. We talked for a bit, he fried me up a fried egg and cheese sandwich, and I shared some of my delicious veggies and dill dip that my Aunt sent me off with.

Today is Super Sunday, as some may call it. We went for a walk around Portland, Maine to grab some bread and I forgot my usual plates/containers from which to eat. So I had to get something to eat the vast amount of prepared foods I cooked up just before I left. My cooler is packed full and with some ice, so the Winter should keep everything fresh when the car is stationary. I can only hope, cos I have some very fresh, and delicious food. the highlights include, salmon filet, turkey sliders, turkey bbq meatballs, cous cous, redskin mashed potatoes, and much much more.

As much as I'd love to be home, watching the big game today at my friend Andy's house (he always prepares the best food in the world) - I will be playing at a new spot in Portland (new for me) tonight). This will be the kick off to what I deem to be a brief winter/spring tour. I'm kind of bummed I don't have more shows setup, however, i think that if I look back on past blogs from years back I probably always would have wanted more shows. More... More... More? More... more?

My couch surfing host, shannon (a dude) is really cool. we are hitting it off and are about to head out on the town to walk around and explore. we just did a jam between sentences. He played me the first song he ever wrote.

anyway I think i'll cut this short since we are drinking some mysterious lizard juice (definition possibly never to come), but it tastes good and it's cold.

anyway, getting psyched to get a back into performance mode tonight and for the next few weeks.

Also, I did a video for a local sports channel contest recently with Cort Johns of Digitelio. I will attempt to embed the video into this blog.



Hope you enjoy, drive slow, and breathe fast.

-j