it's so common, I wonder if it's become cliche: the summer of love. Love has been absent, or at least severely tardy for me this summer. Also, I've been absent. absent from the stage, but not from the craft. and not from under the sun. and not from the ice rinks. touring kind of took me in a direction I never thought existed. It dramatically altered my life. I feel like I used to be normal. then once I hit the road, life became different. i didn't even put out any resumes after I graduated. and the one or two that I did send out some time in the first year I prayed I wouldn't get called back on, and they never did call. there's a lot of uncertainty for me right now. luckily I can vent these feelings now, cos I feel like this blog has been so outdated that very few will read it. I'm in the process of recording demos for some sort of new project. I don't know what the project will include. for the first time I'll have to actually choose which songs will and will not be included. before it was mainly all the songs I had at the time were all recorded and maybe one got left off, cos it sounded like crap.
i thought i had that staying power, but I took myself off the road. money is money, people can do without it. i took myself out of the scene, whichever scene that was. in hockey I always used to clean up. so i'm just going to do what I can to clean things up and try to start it up again. its like when you stop your internet or phone service, but you don't cancel it entirely. the phone company still charges you the shutoff fee and the re-activation fee, but it's not cancelled... oh no...
im going to have to take on more than just fees to come back, but I'd like to surf the net again... it's not like I ever intended to stop. It's not like I ever intend to. that would be the life. it was the life. but it was cut short.
I'm going to try to salvage a very small string of dates in fall. probably stay in the midwest, play some familiar places. we'll see...
i was never absent in school, I came to every class, that's how i passed. I wasn't much of a test-taker and I didn't do much homework, but I always showed up, cos where the hell else was I supposed to be at the time?
JA